No Job but I'm Cool with that.

In June I quit my job.  I know that might sound counter-intuitive, but it really was the best thing for me.  I was working for a trailer company and wasn't getting any closer to my career objectives.  I have continued in school and worked my ass off to get closer to what feels like is the "ever-elusive degree".  The money was nice but every day I went to work I felt like I was in the wrong place.  I may have quit my job but there has to be something else down the road for me.  Sometimes you just have to have faith that another door will open.  This is me having faith.

First Day of Overtime in Months

At the beginning of the week we were told there was more work in the shop than could be completed in the week and there were several jobs promised out for next week.  I found out I was going to be working this weekend and thought well, maybe it would be slow in between the guys getting parts.  I was so wrong.  There is research that has to be done on what jobs are coming into the shop and parts that need to be pulled or ordered.  There were jobs that needed to be closed and rivets that needed to be bagged.  It was crazy-busy!
Thanks to my Dad and Billy for taking care of Sarah while I was gone.  As usual Mr. Y. had other plans.
Sarah and I played before bed and then she got in the shower and now we are going to bed.  This life is pretty mundane.
I hope you have a wonderful day.

Things are always in motion

On February 10th, the gentleman working the back parts counter put in his 2-week notice.  Ordinarily that would mean time to train the person taking over and there would be a general changing of the guard.  In the case of our office, the gentleman accepted an offer from a competitor.  This meant his last day on the job was the same day he turned in his notice.  The gentleman (let's just call him Frank) was very good at his job, but was dissatisfied in his current position.  He wanted more and let's face it, it's hard to make a change after 10 years at the same place.  He left and that left all of us in the parts department to fill in the gaps.
After about three days the back parts counter starting to get out of hand.  There was no consistency and the service techs were helping themselves to whatever they needed to get the job done.  There was one instance that my boss asked me if I knew why there was a 300 dollar part sitting on the counter and if I knew what job it was for.  I said no, but I'm more than willing to find out what goes to what.  I went right up to the shop supervisor and asked him what that part was there and what job it belonged to.  I was given immediate results.  Nobody scares me.
Apparently this action turned heads and I was asked to fill in until they could hire someone.  At the end of the month, I was told they were doing interviews and that they were looking to fill the position immediately.  Of course I applied.  I love working the back counter and I love the techs.  They are smart and in some cases worldly. I've never been treated like a dumb girl.  They take the time to teach me new things every day.  I feel like I'm evolving every minute I'm back there.
I knew it wasn't the company's desire to have me in back, but out front where I can be visible and helpful to the walk-in customers.  I told them I was cool with whatever their decision would be.
They hired a new guy and it was my job to show him the ropes.  It was kind of complicated because I'm still new and learning as well.  It was all good though.  No matter what I was still employed by a company I love and working with great people.
On Friday of last week (the 9th and nearly one month later) I was called into the boss's office (along with the new guy I was training).  We were sat down and told that I was going to be working the back parts counter and the new guy was going to be taking over my place at the front counter.  What a shocker right?  There was no other discussion about this.  I thought I didn't get the job and then they just dropped it into my lap.  I have no idea how that could have happened and I was told by my boss that he made best the decision for the company.
I'm so happy to be back there.  I put gum on the counter for the guys that work in the shop and even the receptionist and the drivers.  There are so many smiles.  Its nice to have an environment that feels like family to work for.  Even if it is kinda dysfunctional.  :)

Unsettled

Once again insomnia is my bed partner and I'm up while the sane are sleeping.
Yesterday I woke up with a different sense of purpose and knew I was going to do something a little different for me.  I've been unhappy with my weight for sometime.  I have a gym membership but never go.  Usually when I have the time to go to my gym they aren't open or I have Sarah with me and there isn't someone to watch her. Go figure huh?
I went to Sports Authority at Cascade Station and bought an elliptical trainer.  The price was A$1099.00, but was on sale for $599. It was the middle of the road model that had some nice features without the 3k price tag.
Mimi's boyfriend and I shoved it down the stairs (because there was no way we were lugging it up the stairs) and took it out of the box and brought up the pieces individually.
After 2 hours (and more than a few curse words) we finished assembling it in the computer room.
Izzy didn't say anything to me about the purchase.  I was more than prepared for my argument.  This is MY version of liposuction and I want to be in good shape for the rest of my future. I will never be physically perfect, but I won't be shallow enough to get cosmetic surgery to fix my imperfections or take the place of regular exercise.
This is the beginning of my journey. My weight is 223 and I'm 5'8.5".  My goal is 185.  I think I can be there by November.
On a side note:
I had a tumor removed that was growing on top of my ribcage  It was the size of a pancake and about two inches thick.  It was a fatty tumor and was pressing on my ribs when I breathe and exerted myself.  It was huge (to me at least) and I feel so much better now that she removed it.
I get my stitches out on Wednesday.  I'm sure it's nothing and we will just move on from here.

Looking Back

I took some time today to look at and read over the previous posts from this blog.
Apparently there are some things left unfinished:
I didn't get to keep the service writer job at xxx.
I was fortunate enough to find an equally rewarding position at xxxxx. I do believe everything happens for a reason! I make more money and don't have to work any overtime!
Izzy finished his MBA in December.
The twins lost about 250lbs between the two of them. They are thinner now than when they were in high school. They look amazing and I am ever so proud of them!!!!!
Spocky turned a year old on February 2, and is now full grown at 45 pounds. He looks like a greyhound!
Holidays passed, time passed, but my friendships have been a constant positive force in my world! Thank you to Pegi, Karen, Nikol, Danny, Rick, and all of the girls in my cohort. With you, all things are possible!!!

When was the last time you...?

OK- when was the last time you hugged your best friend?
When was the last time you went out of your way to help someone you don't know?
When was the last time you volunteered somewhere?
What is your best friend's strongest attribute?
Sometimes I think we forget these simple things in the course of our busy days.
I'm fortunate enough to have a very close family and very close friends. People around me are always willing to give more of themselves than they expect in return.
Please give more of yourself than you thought you could. Others will appreciate it and you may find yourself a little richer in your emotional bank account!

So many things have happened...

Since my last post our oldest daughter was diagnosed with type-1 diabetes.
This one of those random events that just happened and none of us were expecting it.
She called me from work and told me she was feeling really bad and wanted me to pick her up at work and take her to the hospital. I got to her place of employment and she looked like she wasn't feeling good. I drove her to Adventist hospital and they weren't jammed into the gunnels with patients. They took us right in and immediately started with blood work. Within about 10 minutes the PA was in the room telling us that her blood sugar was too high. I thought about it and remember way back to about two years ao when were told the same thing by one of the Providence ER docs, but there never seemed to be any conversation other than it was high. This time there was a number associated to it. It was 660. Less than 30 minutes went by and there was an RN in Mimi's room with a syringe in her hand and she was explaining that we needed to get her blood sugar down. At that point the supervising ER doc came in and introduced herself. I'm embarrassed that I don't remember her name, but that was the least of my concern that night. She told us that Mimi was a type-1 diabetic and would need insulin to control this. I'm also embarrassed to say that there are plenty of warning signs and none of them added up to diabetes. This was Oct 12, 2011.
There have been many challenges since then. We are always trying to find the right balance between Humalog and Lispro. Now we are trying to preserve kidney function. This means blood pressure medications and trying to find another balance within her body. Mimi is determined to continue as if life hasn't changed. Her new boyfriend feels sad that she can't have dessert. She was quick to point out that she could have dessert, just not as much and to watch her sugar levels.
My biggest shock was how much birthcontroll pills affect her sugar levels. She went from almost normal to nearly double. There has to be an alternative to the pill that won't mess with her sugar levels.
She will find that balance eventually!

Nearly A Month Between Posts These Days

Hi to all!

School schedule and work are keeping me from spending any personal time blogging or doing anything else that I enjoy.  We're kind of stalled on the garage.  My dad is tied up taking care of my mom and there are vacations and all such manner of things.
Spock is growing like a weed.  He's close to 30 pounds now.  He was only 5lbs when we picked him up from OHS.  He's healthy and happy.  His favorite new toy is a frisbee.  Man that dog can run and jump.
Sarah started swim lessons this week.  She's the oldest, the tallest, and the least experienced in the water. I hope she enjoys it.  It's such an important part of growing up!
I gotta finish getting ready for work (which is amazing).
I hope you have a great day!
I love you my friend!

I Keep Telling Myself This is Only Temporary

I'm sure not everyone has the same take on life that I do.
This week has been an absolute blur.
I worked 6.5 hours of overtime last week.  That made it slip by.  This week there will be no overtime because I'm a new employee and you have to be with the company for 6 months to see the benefits of a holiday weekend.
It was good.  I spent the whole Fourth of July weekend in the backyard trying to make it habitable by humans.  It was barely habitable by Spock.  Now I'm not ashamed to invite a friend over for a beer or a bbq.
Spock has really come into his own.  He is taking his place as the protector of Sarah and I.  Tonight he was guarding the backdoor.  He was fierce in his protection of us from some unknown shadow he saw. Do dogs imagine movements?  I know they anticipate them.  Anyone who has ever thrown a ball to a dog knows they can anticipate your every flex of muscle. I don't know what Spock saw but he went berserk barking at it.  As soon as he thought the danger was gone he came downstairs and climbed in bed with Sarah and snuggled up against her.  Love is simple and basic between a girl and her dog.
Glad to still have you here!

Crazy-Busy

So life appears to be a whirl-wind.  I've had at least one hour of overtime every day for the last 2 weeks.  The warmer it gets, the faster the refrigeration units fail if they are limping along.  Then everybody has an emergency because ice cream will melt, strawberries will mold, and flowers will wilt. Such is the life that is mine.
The hubster isn't adjusting to my new schedule as well as I thought he would.  He liked me being at home more and doesn't like the added pressure to his already chaotic schedule.  I'm sure it will be better when....  Don't I always say that though?  This is pretty much the same schedule I was running at FM, but the big difference is OT now.
I deactivated my Facebook account a couple of weeks ago.  Part of me really misses it because I was able to see everyone's pictures and what they were doing.  Now I have to rely on email and the truth is - no one writes to me except my dad.  His stuff is pretty funny though.
10 pm comes early; 5 am also comes early.  There's a long weekend in my future.  I'm hoping for Sunday morning sun to hike the falls.  I know it will be packed, but Sarah's never seen it and I wanted her to hear the legends and see if she can see the princess in the mist.
The Gorge is beautiful this time of year.
Did I tell you that Chris and I are both in school?
Yup - this is a crazy-busy life.

Can you feel the changes forming?

I tell myself that life is in flux all the time.  Nothing is permanent.
I started dancing two weeks ago. Every Saturday.
I was officially accepted to WP.
I started working more OT.
I ran with the dog last night. It wasn't much but it was a start.  Ankle has finally healed.
I'm crabby because I have more expectations of others than they are capable of.
I'm crabby because I don't get enough sleep.
A.D.D. dogs and owners don't always mix.
I'm restless and want more. More what?
Life always has more questions than answers.  Now I just need to find them.
The question is - What do you want?

One Month To The Day

Once again insomnia is my bed partner.
I started a new job and changed colleges, so there are many things that have me uneasy.  These things don't mesh well with sleep.
The job seems to be all-too familiar.  Its nearly the same job I had a few years back, but smaller scale and no psycho cube-neighbor. Nice because I understand what most of what the techs are doing.  As far as entering their time on the job sheets and making sure the right hours get charged to the right job, it's pretty much the same (just different codes and people instead of vendors).  There is also someone there who understands this is where the profitability is; I can ask questions at this job without fear that I will get screamed at by the psycho.  Amazing. Oh and the boss wanted to know if I could start coming in early and staying late (including Saturdays) starting next week.  That didn't take long.  So glad to be in a place where I feel wanted and appreciated.  It's going good.
As far as the reason I changed colleges goes - I was feeling the pressure of wanting to have this completed. I feel kinda like I've played at this degree without enough direction.  I seriously thought about completing it at PSU, but the thought of paying for parking would kill me.  Warner Pacific is nearly the same distance without downtown traffic.  I also don't have anyone to compete with at WP.  My boys (graduating with honors) footsteps are too big to follow in.
Yeah - I know I'm not competing for anything, but I also didn't want to compare my experience with theirs.  They don't have kids and full-time jobs.  That's enough to make you settle for "B's" for grades.  I don't want straight A's.  I just want to complete my degree.  I want to be done.  I want that damn piece of paper to hang on my wall.  I need it for me.  Sure, I could have gone to the degree mill and bought one but what would that have done for me?  NOTHING.  I want to work for it.  I need the sense of accomplishment.
That being said, I'm starting to get sleepy.  Sweet dreams to you.
By the way, It's been a month to the day since my last post.  I haven't forgotten you.
Love you.

The Work Continues

Today started out very much like any other day in the last year.  I had men working on my garage.
The siding is being put up now.  The difference between now and three months ago, is that Mr. Y is home from Afghanistan.  There is no conversation devoted centering around his safety.  That conversation is saved for my nephew Andy and for Zach.  Packages are being created and prayers said for their safe return.
I'm sure you're wondering why Chris isn't working on this.  Well, he is but not as fast as he would like.  We both have college and Bunny and other obligations that are sapping our time as well as our energy.  There is little time left for the garage; barely enough for the regular household chores that seem to just magnify when they aren't done in a timely fashion.
So - the German, the Irishman, and the Russian are in my backyard with their dogs and they are sharing stories as well as creating a few more to share at a later date.
I am very fortunate to have these men in my life.

Back Into The Groove

Chris is finally back at the bureau.  His first week back is modified duty because he hasn't qualified with weapons in over a year.  The child Abuse Team is attending their annual Child Abuse Summit (a multi-agency cooperative presentation) where different agencies talk about new case law, and how technology is effecting the jurisdiction's ability to perform their tasks and the investigation of new and current cases.  It's all very deep, but he does it with grace and maturity.
We are both in school now, and it's taking some getting used to in order to keep the schedule straight.  He has class on Monday night and I'm in class Monday, Wednesday, and Friday.  Monday seems to be our frantic day.  Wednesday is the day Sarah has ballet so I just have to leave class half an hour early to take her to class.  Her ballet only meets once per week and mine is twice. It hasn't had any effect that I have noticed.  I seem to be doing fine in that class.  My Word class and Anatomy & Physiology are more difficult.  I'm doing it though.
Things are different in more than one way here at home.  There is the shift of responsibility and who is taking care of what chores.  I remember reading in one of those military magazines that this is very common.  The soldier needs to readjust by falling back into their own roles if they are actively seeking to do so.  Shunning the role is a sign of PTSD.  I have watched for signs and symptoms but have not seen anything so far that would lead me to believe he has any lasting after effects.
There is also the adjustment to Kozmo's passing.  Our beloved dog of ten years was euthanized on March 22, 2011.  He was ill and the vet said it was only going to get worse.  His illness affected his personality and demeanor.  He had bitten both of the girls; thankfully neither of the girls were scarred from the bites.  His loss was difficult for all of us, especially Sarah.  He was there when we brought her home from the hospital and never left her side.  He was her protector and companion, as he was all of ours.  He will truly be missed.
The next adjustment was to filling the void that Kozmo left behind.  Chris and I promised each other from early on in our relationship that if he was in the reserves, we would always have a dog here for protection and companionship.  Finding a dog that would fit into our lifestyle isn't always easy.  I like big dogs.  Chris, on the other hand, likes small dogs.  We wanted something in-between that would be good for car rides and camping.  We also wanted a dog that liked water and swimming.  But above all, we wanted a dog that needed to be saved.  I didn't want to contribute to the ever-growing population of dogs that are just "out there",  I needed to rescue one.  All of our cats are rescues and were saved from sad existences.  One was born in my father's woodpile to a feral mother, and the other was born on a farm to a feral mother.  Both were trapped and "fixed" and brought into our home as kittens.  We wanted to do the same for the dog.  It needed to be a puppy.  What better place to start than the Oregon Humane Society?
On April 15, 2011 I asked my son Billy and his girl friend Meagan and our youngest daughter Sarah to go with me to the OHS because there was a litter of puppies that was transferred there the previous night.  I had seen pictures of the puppies and knew they were all named after the original Star Trek cast.  By the time we arrived at OHS, there were only 2 left.  They looked pathetic.  They were starved and dehydrated.  Both had kennel cough and their skin was dry.  They had also both been neutered the day before.  What a rough start they had indeed. All the more reason for me to take one home and change both of our lives.  His name is Spock.  I took him to the vet three days after we brought him home because the kennel cough was so bad he couldn't stop coughing.  He was given antibiotics and subcutaneous fluids.  The poor guy only weighed 5 pounds and was eight weeks old.  Given his medical state, I was told to bring him back for a follow-up visit in two weeks.  We took him back to the vet after the two weeks had passed and low and behold - he had stopped coughing, gained three pounds and his coat and skin were starting to improve.  It was amazing.  He was now healthy enough to resume his required immunizations.  We did it.  We adopted a puppy and transformed our grief-stricken lives.  Spock hasn't learned to bark at the doorbell yet, but there's time.

Saddest Day of My Life in a Long Time

Now that the hubster is home, the rest of the world can fall spectacularly apart.  And, true to form - it does happen.
Billy and I took Kozmo to the vet last night to have him euthanized. There was nothing that could have been done to save him.  Kozmo bit both of the two people that he has been protecting for the last ten years. First he bit Sarah but didn't draw blood.  It was more like he snapped at her and scared the crap out of her.
With Mimi, he bit and drew blood.  Not a ton, but there was enough that I had to make the hardest decision.
Once Mikey, Billy and I were in the room, the vet injected the pentobarbital.  It took less than two minutes for his heart to stop and to leave this world.  I wanted it to be easier than it was.  Now that it's done, everything reminds me of him and there is still a crapload of dog hair that I need to vacuum.
This is depressing.  Sad and I just want it to be over.